Update on my life. The Hypodeemic Nirdle.

Well, I managed to get through last week without any visits from the nurses. On Friday morning I got up and decided not to put the splint on my wrist. The 6 weeks was well up and it should be healing properly, Today (Wednesday ) is the first time I can actually raise it so there’s real progress. So I didn’t get to bed on Friday night as Mike was visiting so I stayed up with him then caught up on work later. My first chance at a nap came Saturday afternoon and he swears my snores rattled the windows.

Sunday night after Mike had gone home my legs were itching. I nodded off in my chair and woke to blood drenched hands. Joey seemed alright and I heard he usual mocking little laugh when he saw me. Obviously I hadn’t murdered him but his laugh came to an abrupt halt when he saw my hands. Finally the slow realisation that I was sore penetrated my brain . My talons had been at work again. I washed my hands and wiped off  the worst of he blood and applied antiseptic and a steroid cream.

Monday night was another sleepless one. I was not  what you’d call the brightest bulb that day so that when a nurse appeared on the scene just before 2.00 pm she was hardly through the door when I was rolling up my trouser leg and waggling the offending limb before her face. She must have thought it part of some ritual of Master Masons introducing themselves to each other. No, no David she said, I’m here to give you your covid innoculation.  Oh, said I trying to make believe I’d been brushing some dirt off the end of my trouser leg. If you’d like to go through to the lounge, I’ll be with you in a minute.. I was wearing three items on my top. Nothing to stress about. A waistcoat with four old man friendly big buttons and just three were fastened. They weren’t cooperative but I  managed it. That left just a lightweight polo-neck jumper and a tee-shirt, not even a rude one. I pulled at the jumper and it moved easily but with it came the teeshirt. I tried every way I could to separate them, I jer-jer-jiggled but to no avain so with a last pull I dragged them both off. Are you alright David, she called, I can come through to you if it’s easier. I’m OK, just getting my shirt off, I said kicking myself. Idiot, you’re not wearing one.

I righted my teeshirt and put it back on and went through to the lounge. Right hand or left hand she asked. For a moment I thought I was getting a treat but perhaps I’d made a big enough fool of myself already. I answered, Right handed and that seemed to be what she wanted. We’ll do it in your left arm then. I saw her pick up this large hypodeemic nirdle and gritted my teeth. Then I saw her putting it down again. Problem, I asked. All done she said,  A little suspiciously I wondered whether she was selling doses on the black maarkkkkkket (Sorry Money Supermarket advert got the best of me then) but it seemed unlikely given that each dose is only a couple of pounds. You might feel a slight headache for a while but don’t worry. Then your second one will be between eight and twelve weeks from now, if you haven’t heard from us within ten weeks just ring us to make sure you haven’t fall between the cracks. I didn’t even bother to joke it would have to be some crack for me to fall between. I gave her a bag of sweets for the surgery( a fair price) and waved her off. The headache came and went.

I had the Oxford AstraZeneka vaccine so I’m cheering for the home team. I hear lots of reasons why people don’t want it ranging from they don’t trust the Government, there are nanos inside designed to keep tabs on us to quite simply Covid is not a real disease, it’s no worse that the flu. Whatever your reason, just bear in mind the number of deaths worldwide and you should think of keeping yourself and your family safe.

Be happy. Sending Hugs around the World

David.

About davidprosser

Retired Local Government Officer who started to write at age 60 and hasn't looked back. Writes a humorous diary on the life of a member of the gentry.......and the village he lives in with his sadistic early morning alarm cat Oscar and his wife the formidable Lady J. Oscar even has his own book now, but the writing has stopped.
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15 Responses to Update on my life. The Hypodeemic Nirdle.

  1. jilldennison says:

    AHA!!!! I knew you’d been scritching! You didn’t tell me you had managed to remove all the skin from one leg, though! Clip the claws, old man! Glad you got your vaccine and that the side effects were minimal.

    Cwtch

    Liked by 2 people

  2. John and I had our second inoculation today, so I was very amused to read about your first. It was hilarious. Grandson David was near me, and I had to read him the choicest sentences. Your “hypodeemic nirdle” had us laughing aloud. Thank you for our entertainment tonight.

    Hypo Hugs!

    Liked by 2 people

  3. MELewis says:

    You may need to get declawed like a house cat for your own good. (Joey might even approve!) Very glad you got the jab, David. Hope it does the job in keeping you healthy until the next round. Thank you for the hilarious tale telling along the way. x

    Liked by 2 people

  4. Couldn’t they give you something for the itching? I have to take antihistamine for mine…

    Liked by 1 person

  5. inavukic says:

    Waiting for AstraZeneca myself 🙂 Sick and tired of BS by anti vaxxers. Don’t mind being kept tabs on either – nothing to hide here 🙂 But tell that to some! Hugs, David. Keep well

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Keith says:

    David, thanks for the update. Glad you got the vaccine. Keith

    Liked by 1 person

  7. tidalscribe says:

    I had AstraZeneka and only had to go to our local surgery.

    Like

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